Monday, June 9, 2014


As some of you may or may not be aware, I'm in the middle of getting a divorce. I've been separated for three years now, and I suspect many thought I already was divorced. There's a variety of reasons I found it difficult to just jump into getting my divorce done right away. But that's not what I'm here to talk about today.

As of a couple of weeks ago papers were signed, witnessed by a notary, and sent to my lawyer for filing. I'm waiting for confirmation any day now that the judge has signed the final judgement and I am a legally single person again.

I have told some people and gotten slightly varied reactions. They have been largely positive with some expressing relief that things are progressing smoothly while others have congratulated me.

While I understand the spirit with which congratulations are being given, after time and reflection I find it an odd thing to say under the circumstances.

I understand things got bad at the end, and it is a relief to be out of the situation I was in. No one knows better than I, who lived through it. However that doesn't change the fact that once upon a time, this person was my best friend and someone that made me happy. It doesn't change the fact that divorce signifies the end of what used to be the closest relationship possible between two people.

I'll be relieved when it's done. I don't regret my decision. It needed to be made. I'm finally ready to let go of the past, although being ready to fully move on may be a long time in coming. I understand in a situation like mine it's hard to know what to say, but I wish that people understood that despite everything, I'm not happy that it came to this.


  1. I feel you expressed yourself extremely well Sis. I too am relieved that this is almost over for you and as you move forward as a single mom of two wonderful children Jehovah will be there to guide your steps. You are a good example of staying close to Him through all of this and I am proud of being your friend.

    1. Thank you Virginia! <3 I didn't want to make anyone feel badly, because I know it's absolutely a difficult situation to know what to say. And I know the things that are said are meant well. But I also felt like I needed to say what I felt about the situation too. Thanks for commenting.

  2. Yes, I agree that it would be quite hard to find the words to say to someone who had just been recently divorced. "Congratulations" implies a celebration, but divorce is certainly not a cause of one. Perhaps, as you said, it's relief that's being celebrated. Either way, it's great that you're looking forward to the fresh start, and that people you know are genuinely happy for you. Take care!

    Clifford Wheeler @ Powell, Spencer & Partners Solicitors